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Matrix Jokes

Submit your own jokes by contacting me! Not all submitted jokes will make it, and I can't promise that my standards for judging joke quality will be objective. Also, shorter jokes are more likely to make it than longer jokes.

  • Yo mama is so fat, she needs a conference call to extract her from the Matrix.
  • I walked into a bar full of ugly women and swore I entered the Matrix. All I was seeing were 1s and 0s.
  • What is the Oracle unable to see past? Irrational choice? Wrong. The Oracle is unable to see past yo mama because she is so fat.
  • They changed something in the matrix, and now all the eigenvalues are wrong.
  • Yo mama is so fat, when Morpheus offered her the red or blue pill, she had to call her pharmacist to check for contraindications.
  • Yo mama is so fat, everyone who sees her self-substantiates.

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